


where to start

by wouldratherbe



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, F/F, Rachel's going through it, References to Depression, Self Confidence Issues, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:20:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27773659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wouldratherbe/pseuds/wouldratherbe
Summary: "You’re the only one that can deal with her when she gets like this."or: Quinn brings Rachel back.
Relationships: Rachel Berry/Quinn Fabray
Kudos: 64





	where to start

**Author's Note:**

> I was talking to @paradoxalpen on Twitter, and this happened. Credit to her where due <3 so pretty much the whole thing.
> 
> title from 'two' by sleeping at last.

In all reality, Quinn had no clue how it all started. She tended to zone out during glee club, and respond on autopilot. It had worked for a while, too. The only person who could break her peace was… well, she was also the only person that kept Quinn from ditching the damned club.

“I’m not going to sit here and waste my time with people who couldn’t care less about what we do in here! Call me when you want to work.”

The tiny brunette barely gave her girlfriend a glance before storming out of the choir room, but all eyes were on Quinn, desperate for her to fix it.

Well, some people were less than desperate, but Quinn knew they wanted her to, all the same.

She scowled, standing up. “Why does it always have to be me? Why can’t it be… I don’t know. Her _teacher,_ or…” There weren’t really any other good options.

“Because you’re the only one that can deal with her when she gets like this,” Kurt scoffed, crossing his arms across his body and looking Quinn square in the eye.

Santana piped up from across the room, smirking. “Well, nicely, anyway. I’ll go, but you won’t like how I handle it.”

“Quinn,” Mr. Schuester called, pressing against the space in between his brows, as if he were in pain. “Can you please go get her? Or, at least… Talk her down?”

The blonde huffed, and slowly made her way from the top riser, Rachel’s water bottle in hand. A solid thirty seconds had passed by the time she made it to the door, and she turned back, silently pleading with the crowd. They all acted as if she wasn’t even there, except for one _idiot_ in the front row.

“I’ll go!” Finn offered, and Quinn shot him a glare, crossing her arms. His hand lowered as quickly as it had shot up.

She made eye contact with her teacher, and he smiled gratefully at her, nodding his head in thanks and receiving an eye roll in response.

Quinn felt like she was on death row, walking the length of the silent hallway. Rachel wasn’t by her locker, or in the performing arts hallway, meaning that she was probably in a bathroom somewhere, or the theatre maybe. The bleachers were also a possibility. Rachel was fast when she was angry.

The cheerleader steadily sped up as every place she looked came up empty, and would’ve walked past the bleachers completely, if it weren’t for the bright orange sweater she spotted at the top of them. She slowed her jog (when the hell had she started jogging?) to a stop, and squinted into the light, before looking behind her.

Coach Sylvester was yelling at the junior varsity Cheerios, paying no attention to the girls. Quinn took that as a blessing and began to climb towards her girlfriend.

Rachel looked at her once, gave her the tiniest smile she’d ever seen Rachel wear, and stayed silent.

Quinn sat down next to the girl, unnerved, and put her hand next to Rachel’s, tapping her pinkie with her own. Usually, if Rachel had an audience at a time like this, she’d be pacing back and forth, eyes wide with anger, speaking faster than Quinn thought possible, and garnering the attention of every human being in a mile radius.

Rachel turned her hand over, and grasped the blonde’s squeezing it once before releasing it, and pulling her hand back into her lap.

“Rachel?” her girlfriend tried, tilting her head.

“Thank you.”

Quinn stared at her, confused. “For wh-”

“For always… coming after me. It means more than you know.”

She looked Quinn in the eye, and the blonde couldn’t help the butterflies that erupted in her stomach with how intensely Rachel was looking at her. And then she realized that it was not _that_ type of intensity, and instead just a really strong sadness, one that she had seen too many times on Rachel’s face. She once vowed to never make her look like that again. It didn’t help, knowing that it was something she hadn’t caused. Quinn still felt like shit.

“I-I know that being with me can be…” Rachel paused, a little self-deprecating smirk flashing across her face, and Quinn frowned. _“Difficult,_ so-”

“It’s not difficult.”

“Yeah, right,” the brunette scoffed. “We’ve been dating for seven months, and we already fight like an old married couple.”

Quinn bristled, reaching for Rachel’s hand and holding it with both of hers. “So what? There’s no one else I would rather fight with... There’s no one else I would rather make up with, either.”

“Smooth.”

 _“I_ thought so,” Quinn giggled, looking over. Rachel didn’t even smirk. “Hey.”

Her girlfriend looked up from their conjoined hands, eyes suspiciously shiny. “Hm?”

“You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Rachel smiled. She didn’t nod, just smiled.

Quinn grimaced, taking both of Rachel’s hands in her own as she straddled the bench, facing her girlfriend. _“Rachel.”_

“Yes, Quinn, I know.”

The blonde nodded, turning Rachel’s hands over so she could look at her palms. God, her hands were tiny. “Good, because… I don’t know. I don’t want you to hurt. And if you _are_ hurting, I want to know, so I can fix it.”

“You can’t always fix everything, Quinn.”

She exhaled at the truth of that statement, staring into Rachel’s eyes.

 _But I can fix you. I can build you up ‘til you’re good as new. Until it’s like I never touched you. Like I never hurt you. Because I need you to be okay. I need the_ one _good thing in my life to be okay. I love you too much to let you just not be okay._ There was so much she wanted to say. She didn’t say any of it.

Instead, she pulled Rachel close, kissed the side of her head, and said, “I can try.”

**Author's Note:**

> this does exist in the same universe as 'situational insanity,' but it's a ways away, so.... it's not linked as a series.
> 
> come talk to me on twt or tumblr @countinsix!!!
> 
> please leave kudos and comments if you enjoyed!! thanks for reading xx


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